It’s 1AM in the Philippines and I CANT BREATHE!


Just woke up from a nightmare. I was at Hampton University. Part of a protest. I got in a car to retreat from the cold. As the protest start picking up. Students passed by banging on the windows chanting “Black Lives Matter.” I knocked on the window to get an update. A familiar voice from my college days told me they were going to be filming where we were. I got out of the car to show my support then the dream sort of shifted. The next thing I know I am next to a cop on horseback and I am somewhat underneath the horse with a helmet on my head. We are listening to a speaker. While the speech is going on the horse is kissing my face. I close my eyes and mouth to prevent the wet intrusion. In the process, I lose my balance. I guess I make the female officer nervous. She says “Ms. Jay, please don’t do that again. You should be standing still.” I apologize and tell her it won’t happen again. But the horse continues to wipe my face clean with its saliva. I lose my balance again. The officer says again. “Ms. Jay I’m asking you again. What is preventing you from keeping two feet off the ground.” As a gut reaction. I try to show the officer how I was losing my balance with my eyes closed. I realized this was a poor choice on my part. I apologized and convince myself not to flinch another inch but it was too late. The officer already felt threatened and the next thing I know I was having pepper spray coating where the horses spit had been. I close my eyes preventing any harm to my vision but this caused me to hit the ground and still inhaling some of the spray. I hold my breath to keep from inhaling but I get no relief because even when I’m down, the officer is still spraying in my face. Life was slipping from me. In the final moments before the dream ended I thought “I can’t breathe”


-The Natural Travelista 
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